What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Woman attacked by rabid cat in Lynchburg, health officials say - WSET

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Why do people always talk about Ohio as it's a dangerous city?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Which Red Sox prospect will be next to draw Roman Anthony-level excitement? - MassLive

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Pope Leo XIV Dons White Sox Hat During Public General Audience in Vatican - Sports Illustrated

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Can you write a poem or short story based on the first image that shows up on Pinterest?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Which bands became massively popular for covering songs rather than recording originals?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

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How do teachers justify punishing a student for fighting back against their bullies?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Why do people mourn when their leaders lose elections? Is it common for people to cry over events that are out of their control?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why won't my mom let me come home if I'm homeless?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why can't NASA just bite the bullet and launch a plainly simple mission, audited by flat earther peers start to finish that definitively proves to even the smallest minds that the earth is an oblong spheroid, and not flat?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …